unleashed

yes this is an update of my life.

hello weekends. okay, not like it made much of a difference being Saturday since i have be relaxing since Thursday evening. hanging out, catching up on shows/movies, playing a childhood game. so i am going to point out four things that i find worth mentioning.

first and foremost, the new year for the science committee is upon NUS FoS. the heads are being selected and what not, very soon the member sign ups will be available and the whole new cycle will begin again. being in my final year and having joined it last year, i am very interested in trying out again this year. in particular, as of now i have two committees in mind. let's see how this will go. fingers crossed.

then, next i would like highlight a movie i watched last night titled "Baby Driver". i was shocked at its IMDB ratings and thought that i might give it a little shot and watch it. well, no regrets there. while the storyline is not very surprising, i like how the plot thickens every few minutes and how the characters were developed. the pace wasn't too fast or too slow.. to my liking. naturally, the fact that i highlighted it here, i would recommend one to catch it as well.

now, to my childhood game. managed to download a software on my Macbook Pro that allowed me to play this game that is essentially only available on Windows computers. it is none other than "Little Fighter 2". well, if you know this game, good for you. if not, it is okay, you can try if you want to. little trick to unlock characters is to type "lf2.net" and hit "ENTER" when you are at the loading screen.

last but not the least, Two Steps From Hell's 2017 album. i am currently listening to it.. like literally just started.. third track. check out the album art.

well, i am sure this album will not disappoint. new trailer tunes.. woohoo. until next time then, cheers.

somewhere i belong

models

yes this is an update of my life.

battling a little with my throat. was sore for the past two days.. today the sore is gone but i have occasional coughs. good gracious me.. not even stressing myself and yet my body shows signs of stress. maybe it is just a inevitable effect. being stressed about school creates time stress. being very chill about school creates stress from probably paranoia. what a weird body i have.

so been working on my revision at a very comfortable pace. ironically, the most "stressful" part of my recess week isn't the revision for midterms but rather working on my FYP. have to focus on creating, selecting, running models for the entire of this week before heading to meet my supervisor again on Monday.

away from work, all my usual shows are slowing starting their respective new seasons. something to look forward to day in day out. until next time then, cheers.

your problems

yes this is an update of my life.

each time a new update on my Macbook pops up, i break into cold sweat. bad past experience i guess. nonetheless, thank goodness that this update is smooth with slight hard hump. hope not jinx-ing it. so yeah, here i am using the new software. i am also aware about the new update for my iphone but i have yet to update as well.. lol.

moving on, i am having a little sore throat. ohh man.. i haven't even over-exert myself and yet my throat decides to give way. been spamming water and what not to keep the breakdown. in the mean time, i am catching up on my modules. after meeting my FYP supervisor yesterday, i have new set of analysis to run as well. that is currently on hold.

being a year 4 has its perks i guess. i have 2 midterms and they start pretty late, not immediately after recess week. so, technically i can really seize this recess week to relax and enjoy myself.

finally, i would like to highlight something interesting i came across the other day. it was from a video which i did not think about saving the link. this speaker spoke about people knowing your problems and that you letting your problems known is very likely to be useless in helping yourself. yes, saying your problems out is pretty useless since "90% doesn't care, 10% would be happy you have them". hmm.. is this too pessimistic?

so i question myself on both sides.. me being the person telling my problems and me on the receiving end of someone's complains. then i came to a conclusion myself. while his statement is somewhat drastic.. i prefer to keep the idea of telling others about your problems doesn't help but not because all of them don't care or are glad you have them. yes, while there is a handful that might fall in those categories, i think at the end of the day, for most problems.. there is only one person who can solve them. the person facing it. folks around you can encourage you or suggest actions but those actions themselves and the willingness to act are all from the person himself/herself. until next time then, cheers.

the spectre

spectre

the need for focus

yes this is an update of my life.

mid-semester right now.. looking back weeks ago i was in a state of confusion. right now.. i am not much better haha besides the fact that i can handle the situation better i guess. there is quite a load on my plate right now. so many things to juggle. so many things to work on. so many things to stress on. weeks ago, the same few things exist.. now they still exist, if not, they are greater in numbers now.

well, like i said i think i am managing them better or at least i am trying to tell my self that to keep focus. each time time i decide to handle and tackle a task, i tend to lose focus after a mere hour or so. in some cases, like surfing Youtube and what not, this could be good to remind myself i have better things, more important things, to settle. for the important tasks, being easily distracted is never a good thing. i really need to focus right now. on the side note, i cannot wait for October as well.. for my weekends from October will be more carefree.

thinking what factors that might have led me to this state. there are tons of possibilities but knowing and acknowledging them will not solve them entirely. i just need to work on what's a hand.. take one step at a time. hopefully not to slow.. but i will make it surely. i have to. until next time then, cheers.

start of crunching

yes this is an update of my life.

pardon me for not updating for the last couple of days. okay, not couple but rather quite some time already. always want to update properly.. so whenever i do not have the feel to write quality posts, i tend to share videos or songs that represent my mood haha. okay, so obviously, i am into updating properly today.

first things first, good news! i have finally received my full data for my FYP and i can finally start crunching and coding properly. reading tons of literature reviews can be really dry and boring. been waiting for the time to code and do some analysis. well, the time is here. i have to be careful though.. i must always remember that FYP is not the only module i am reading this semester lol. i tend to get quite carried away. well, when you are in the mood, you are really in it.

moving on to a reality check. this week is the final week before the start of recess week. time is moving too fast for my liking.. really. well, the bright side is that i have only 2 midterms to really prepare for. the bad side is those two modules happen to be really challenging modules. well, i hope i can make full use of this recess week to recharge and revise. until next time then, cheers.

cool kids

photograph

nights

$9.53

yes this is an update of my life.

i kept telling myself to post on weekend but i did not have the energy nor the motivation to do so. then now i have a little so i shall seize the chance to do so now. so, over the weekend i met my 4th and new tutee.. first impression? it is going to be a challenging task.. he cannot sit still for more than 10 minutes. had to take away little distractions that he find amusing. he played with calculators, pens, rulers and other stuff around the table now and then. i see potential and i really hope i can help him achieve it.

speaking of the weekends, i was very stressed and distracted by the problems i am facing in my FYP. thank goodness, moments ago a small improvement was achieved. nonetheless, on Saturday, due to me over-flowing brain, i made a somewhat costly mistake. literally.. a $9.53 mistake. story was that i was heading to my tutee house in the morning and i could take bus services 37 or 4. so as i sat and waited at the bus stop, my mind drifted and i boarded a bus service that mixed the two numbers. i took bus service 34 instead.

the moment i stepped on the bus, the driver closed the door and moved off. it was then i realised that the bus is too crowded to be service 37 or 4. then i realised my mistake.. i was taking a bus which will stop next at airport terminal 3. ohh my gosh.. i felt so foolish and angry with myself. now i had to cab to my tutee house form T3 despite leaving house earlier. bye bye $9.53.

this week will yet be another hectic week. i just hope i can juggle everything well. until next time then, cheers.

no juices

yes this is an update of my life.

i can feel like i am barely breathing and i am still wondering why. it is only week 4 and the stress and workload is mounting like crazy on top of my head. despite taking one less module than usual semesters.. i am feeling a slightly bigger pinch and stress. no idea what to do but for now i am trying to pin to the root or roots of the problem.. the causes of brain juice being drained at an alarming rate.

could it be the fact that i am taking all core modules? well, probably.. then again, plus FYP, it would be four core modules.. same number as in year 1 semester 1. hmm.. obviously the content and standard are vastly different. nonetheless, the expectations and workload could be way higher a well. now, talking about expectations..

could it be that i am expecting too much from myself? thinking i am capable of doing way more than i can actually handle? biting more than i can chew, so to speak. juggling so many things at one go. nonetheless, i am trying to make my uni life count and treasure the very last year of formal education before heading to work. of course, postgraduate studies aren't out of the question yet but let's not leap too far for now.

could it be that i am encountering more obstacles in my FYP than i originally anticipated? i think this might be the main cause. though no hurry into analysis, i still want to start as soon as possible to avoid the busier periods of the semesters. i initially thought the bulk of my obstacles would be the analysing part and the coding part since the things expected are rather new. no, not that i never analyse or code.. but rather the nature and topic in which they are applied to are rather new to me. however, now even the data retrieval is giving me so many problems. i can only hope certain processes can move along faster so that i can start the coding on my laptop very soon.

could it be that the literature reading is frustrating me? my FYP involves a new concept in which no modules in NUS have taught.. hence i have to rely on countless literature reviews. thing is.. it is not easy and so far i do not have the confident to apply to my project yet. i am fully aware that this part of my FYP will not be the main task until late this semester or even during the winter break. still, i can't help to brood a little over it now and then.

someone once told me that i have a tendency to worry about things that haven't even happen or about things that i have no control over. thing is now i think most of the stuff mentioned above is within my control. am i right or wrong? regardless, i have to really find a way to boost my morale and add those juices to my brain real quick. thanks for reading my problems.. i know it isn't always nice to read things like this on blogs haha. until next time then, cheers.

suteki da ne

hopefully for good

yes this is an update of my life.

pardon my little short absence from this platform but am here now to update what's up. thank goodness for no renovation below where i am staying today. well, hopefully those headache causing drillings have stopped for good. really wonder what the hell they are trying to do with these renovations. they had 3 months of summer to do but they only chose to start when the semester starts.. ohh wells.

with FYP on hold for a moment now, i was able to catch up with all other modules. week 4 already.. getting the hang of the stress, workload and expectations. it will be a hell of a hectic year 4 and September.

as i await for the usual shows that i watch annually to begin, i am turning to movies. currently have one movie in queue and it is none other than "The Mummy". well, i have heard many bad reviews about this remake and what not.. but nonetheless i am going to watch it. in the next couple of days, if you do not see me talking about it here.. yeah, it means it isn't worth your time to watch. still trying to figure what other movies that i wanted to watch.. and are already up online lol. until next time then, cheers.

big sky