simple joys

yes this is an update of my blog.

something small but impactful happened earlier today and i realised that recently i have been giving myself lots of unnecessary stress. small problems probably seen as out-of-proportion issues. over-thinking and brooding too much can have bad side effects. it's time to be sitting down.. not in motion or panic.. appreciating the other simple joys i have around.. those that i have overlooked over the past few days.

guess this is a weakness of mine that will never go away. not necessary a bad thing but still something to keep in check every now and then. i realised i have always been setting high standards for myself. while doing so has helped me to be where i am now in certain way.. but at what cost? cost of focusing on a thing for too long a time and too much effort spent on trying to perfect it. how high a standard is deemed "too high" to be set for oneself anyway?

well for an example, when it comes to studies, for example, i will always want to aim to score above B+ for every module and whenever i feel that i am losing grip to that goal, i get annoyed. at such times when my mum realised the expectations i have for myself.. she will comment "can pass can already". i'm always so puzzled whenever she said so. at times like this, i am not sure if her expectations for me are too low for my liking or just my expectations for myself is too high. of course she believed that it is the latter.

well, i am still caught in how should i set my expectations. not only for studies but in other areas too but just areas that either i don't feel comfortable typing in an open blog or i can't figure how to put them into words. so yeah, as of now, i acknowledge this problem with me. this problem can be a strength, a driving force to strive for excellence but too much can cause me to overlook other areas that are important as well. i am at the stage of correcting that issue right now. simple joys and other things are important as well. small blessings, though small, are collectively larger than any problems i have. time to find the optimism and move forward. until next time then, cheers.